Proverb / Kotowaza
男女七歳にして席を同じうせず
A Confucian teaching that boys and girls should be separated from age seven to maintain proper etiquette and moral distinction.
Boys and girls should not share a seat after the age of seven.
Quick Answer
A Confucian teaching that boys and girls should be separated from age seven to maintain proper etiquette and moral distinction.
- Literal Image
- Boys and girls should not share a seat after the age of seven.
- How to Use It
- Used to describe strict traditional gender segregation or to highlight the importance of maintaining formal distance and manners between sexes.
Meaning
Originating from Confucian etiquette, this proverb teaches that children of different genders should not sit or play together once they reach seven years of age. It emphasizes the importance of maintaining decorum and a clear distinction between males and females during their upbringing. While viewed as outdated in contemporary society, it is sometimes cited to emphasize the value of propriety and traditional boundaries.
Literal Image
Boys and girls should not share a seat after the age of seven.
How to Use It
Used to describe strict traditional gender segregation or to highlight the importance of maintaining formal distance and manners between sexes.
Tone
Literary and traditional; reflects historical Confucian social norms and is considered outdated today.
Examples
現代では時代遅れとされる考えも多いが、男女七歳にして席を同じうせずという言葉に、礼儀の大切さを見出す人もいる。
Although many consider this idea outdated today, some find value in the importance of etiquette expressed by the proverb 'boys and girls should not share a seat after age seven.'
Learning Notes
Key Vocabulary
The expression uses a long classical structure including 'ni shite' and the negative 'zu' ending, along with specific Confucian vocabulary.
男女
だんじょ / danjo
men and women; boys and girls
七歳
しちさい / shichisai
seven years old
席
せき / seki
seat; place
同じうせず
おなじゅうせず / onajuu sezu
do not share; do not make the same
Usage Profile
Usage note: In modern conversation, this is primarily used to describe archaic or extremely conservative views on gender.
Misread Risk
Do not use this to describe modern friendships or co-ed activities unless you are intentionally referencing its traditional, restrictive context.
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Origin
This expression originates from the 'Liji' (Record of Rites), a fundamental collection of texts detailing Confucian etiquette and ceremonial rites in ancient China. These teachings were introduced to Japan and significantly influenced social norms regarding the separation of genders during the formative years of childhood. In modern times, the proverb is sometimes discussed critically from the perspective of gender equality, though it remains a reference for traditional decorum and historical social boundaries.
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Source Note
Where did this entry get its data from? The reference links are listed below. To understand how to read this section, see Data Sources.